Monday, October 1, 2007

Stop Being A Pussy

I've brought you Sports Figures Who Need To Grow Some Balls and Sports Figures Who Need To STFU. Today we have Stop Being A Pussy.

Today's pussy: Ethiopia's Haile Gebrselassie

Haile Gebrselassie broke the world marathon record on Sunday by winning the Berlin marathon in two hours, four minutes and 26 seconds. Almost 3 hours of sweating, cramping, and fatigue that turns even the strongest men into vomiting wimps. But 10 minutes after breaking the record, Gebrselassie called the former record holder and apologized.

What? You don't apologize for breaking a record (unless you're this guy, at which point you should apologize for breathing). You call the former record holder and say “Yeah bitch! Let's see you do THAT!”. Now I'm all for good sportsmanship, but the unwritten rules of competition state that if you're going to kick some ass, you do it unapologetically. So stop sniveling and start training Gebrselassie. I'm sure someone's coming after your record and I guarantee you there will be no apologies when they dust you.

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Speaking of record breaking, Michael Strahan broke the Giants franchise record for career sacks in Sunday's game against the Eagles with a sack on Donovan McNabb. Mark Ecko is now trying to have an asterisk branded on McNabb's ass before launching him into space.

1 comments:

Unsilent Majority said...

Strahan should probably apologize for breaking the single season sack record.