Friday, June 22, 2007

Sports figures who need to grow some balls

So I took a few days off from posting and the Yankees got swept (??) by Colorado. I’m not saying there’s a direct correlation, but whatever.

There’s much going on in baseball land today and so I’ve decided to compile a list of Sports Figures Who Need To Grow Some Balls. Here they are, in no particular order.

1. Dave Trembley. Listen, I understand it’s tough being the hated guy temporarily replacing the other hated guy who just got fired. But putting a player at serious injury risk just to keep up a streak? And not even a record holding streak at that? Grow some balls, dude. Let Tejada cry over his streak and do what’s best for the team. At 15.5 behind, you’ve got bigger issues than meaningless streaks.

2. Bud Selig. Seriously, he’s like the “short bus” lion in the jungle who finally ran down the slowest, fattest antelope (and by slow fat antelope, I mean Giambi). And I think I speak for the majority of the population when I say, MOVE ON. Giambi’s on his way out, he’s not worth much to most teams, aside from some streaky hitting, and he’s not breaking any records. Yes, it’s wrong to cheat. But how about chasing down the other fat antelope who is about to break one of baseball’s most respected records. Just a suggestion.

3. Roger Clemens. You’re pitching like a girl. Grow a set and win a game or two, would ya? I mean, 7 Cy Youngs and you can’t beat the Rockies?

4. Ken Griffey, Jr. One of the most respected players in baseball is afraid of getting booed. I mean, is this a phobia? Or just a small fear? And is there professional treatment for this? Someone get Arod on the phone. And for that matter…

5. Seattle fans. Shut up. You wouldn’t have a franchise if it weren’t for this guy. You should give him a standing ovation and then line up to service his member. Just a suggestion.

I sense this may become a recurring series. Stay tuned.

5 comments:

Yeah Him said...

It's been stated before how Roger Clemens 20 K's (in 1986) murdered Seattle for years. Now they probably wouldn't have had a dynasty with that lineup they fielded during those horrible colors years had he stopped short, but still... Seattle was a combination of the right people (Griffey, A-Rod, Martinez, Buhner, RJohnson) at the right time, and occasionally, all of those trades do pay off.

And while I only ever liked Johnson out of that team, Griffey at least played the game with joy and passion.

All the same, while I'm happy to see Clemens lose, it's not like he let up a lot of runs, and all things considered, the Yankees should have scored. Then again, props to Colorado for hanging in against the Sox and Yanks.

With regards to Giambi, there is 2 good reasons to get rid of him A) Bud gets rid of a loudmouth who bashed his (in)ability to stop steroids and B) it frees up Yankee contract space to go after some nice free agents in July or December.

Not that I'm behind Bud at all - he sucks and I can't wait until he goes.

The same can be said for Tejada's B12 injected self. The sooner his substance inflated self and contract (that nobody else wants) is gone, the sooner Baltimore can get out from under the big 3 steroids user's (Sosa and Palmeiro the other 2) shadows, the better.

Rat In A Cage said...

I went to San Francisco for the weekend series. I thought Friday would be our least likely day to win. i was on cloud nine after that one only to get crushed Sat & Sun. A lot of sullen looking Yankees fans on the plane back to L.A. tonight, but at least they all had on their colors. We might all die a horribly painful death this year, but at least we don't jump ship. I had more to say, but I am exhausted and forget.

Rat In A Cage said...

Could our bull pen suck any worse?

Rat In A Cage said...

They're killing me.

albaNY Hawker said...

Great post.

Thanks for winning the KSK Fantasy football thingy, or I would have never found your site.